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This article, Gary Chalmers, is property of Billy cougar. |
| Gary Chalmers | |
|---|---|
 Startled by the Northern Lights. | |
| Biographical information | |
| Real name | Gabriel "Gary" James Chalmers |
| Also known as | Superintendent, Superintendent Chalmers, Gerry, Gary, Garr, Super Nintendo, old bald guy, Supremeintendent, blowhard, loudmouth |
| Nationality | He is from Sota (claims to be from Utica, NY) |
| Born | Unknown, circa 1784 |
| Age | 239 |
| Status | Alive |
| Physical description | |
| Eye colour | Brown |
| Hair colour | Grey |
| Ethnicity | Sotanian (yellow skin tone) |
| Height | 5'11 (180 cm) |
| Weight | 226 lbs (106kg) |
| Blood type | Red |
| Gender | Male |
| Career, affiliations and family information | |
| Affiliation(s) | Skinner Seymour (occasionally), Springfield Elementary School (former), Agnes Seymour, Lisa Simpsons |
| Enemies | Skinner (occasionally), Ned Flanders |
| Notable family members | Unnamed daughter, unnamed wife |
| Video Games, Movies and Cartoons information | |
| Main appearance(s) (Video Games) | Simpson and Steamed Hams related games |
| Voiced by (English) | Hank Azaria |
- "I thought we were having steamed clams."
- — Chalmers after Skinner tells him he brought hamburgers
- "Aurora Borealis here? Aurora at this time of year? Aurora at this time of day? In this part of the country? Localised entirely within your room of cookery? I must gaze behind that door! May I see it then, Seymour?"
- — Chalmers to Skinner after the latter tells him that there are Northern Lights in his kitchen
Gabriel "Gary" James Chalmers was the former superintendent of Springfield's Elementary School. He is currently living on Earth where he worked as the said superintendent until he moved to the only free state in US of California.
Biography[]
Chalmers hails from the planet Sota, city unknown. He came to Earth around the year of 1990 and a year later, Skinner Seymour who worked on Chalmers' school, came too. There are a sithton of evidence that Gary's main philosophy is liberal or a Democrat, from bashing down family values (which is great) and some of the decisions he has made in his job, specifically when he fired the former principal of the Springfield school for introducing prayer to school and voting for Frank Kenson against Hillary Clinton. Not long ago, Skinner Seymour mentioned that Chalmers had a daughter.
Chalmers is a temperamental and whimsical man unfortunately vested with authority. His mood abruptly swings, and he seemingly-arbitrarily plays favourites and is biased: while constantly having little to no tolerance for Principal Skinner's well-intentioned mistakes. It appears his only reason for constant hostility towards Principal Skinner is because Skinner lied to him a lot back when they were on Sota. Whenever Gary visited Springfield Elementary, some sort of disaster stroke, either because of his extreme anxiety towards Principal Skinner, or because the janitor always fuked something up. Chalmers' catchphrase has caused some paranoia in Skinner. He constantly yelled at him "SEEEEYYMOUUURR!" and "SSSKKKIINNNEEERRR!". Also, more or less, he never called Skinner normally by his name, he just yells his name all the time. After the Steamed Hams event, however, Chalmers finally developed some sort of respect for Skinner.
Chalmers has also been known to be dating Agnes Seymour, Skinner's wife, much to his dismay. Although he sometimes mentions he is married. However, it is strongly implied that he is a widower.
Chalmers's sign is Sagittarius.
Chalmers now lives in the defect California, one of the only liberal states left in US now that it is under Kenson's Dictatorship.
It is known he will return back to Oregon after Kenson's rule ends.
Steamed Hams[]
This memed-up event actually happened on April 14th, 1992. The standard and not edited event was typical that Principal Skinner had invited Superintendent Chalmers over for luncheon in a play on the "dinner with the boss" cliche. The dinner or luncheon, as per the trope, does not go according to plan, as Skinner burns the dinner, leading him to cover the truth about dinner through elaborate and increasingly unbelievable series of lies. After burning the dinner and telling Chalmers that he's making "steamed clams" for dinner, Skinner attempts to convince Chalmers that what he had prepared called "steamed hams" were an expression for hamburgers, he says, which is native to Albany, New York.
Of course, with such an interesting event comes interesting fanbase and 'Steamed Hams' inspired videos have been especially popular on YouTube. There have even been songs of the event.
Quotes[]
- "Well Seymour, I made it -- despite your directions."
- — Chalmers after arriving at Skinner's house
- "SSEEEEYYYMOOOOURRRR!!!!"
- — Gary's catchphrase
- "Why is there smoke coming out of your oven, Seymour?"
- — Gary asking Skinner about smoke from the oven
- "Seymour? Skinner?! SEEEYYYMOOOURR!!!"
- — Chalmers after Seymour fails to reply him
- "You call hamburgers 'steamed hams'? Uh-huh? what region?"
- — Gary after Skinner tells him he calls 'burgers steamed hams
- "Really? Well, I'm from Utica and I've never heard anyone use the phrase 'steamed hams'. Skinner: Not in Utica, no. It's an Albany expression. Gary: A, I see."
- — Chalmers and Skinner
- "Y'know, these hamburgers are quite similar to the ones they have at Krusty Burger."
- — Gary after trying Skinner's burgers
- "Yes, I should be-GOOD LORD, WHAT IS HAPPENING IN THERE!? Seymour: Aurora Borealis. Gary: Ugh... Aurora Borealis!? At this time of year, at this time of day, in this part of the country?? Localised ENTIRELY within your kitchen!?"
- — Gary and Skinner
- "Well Seymour, you are an odd fellow... but I must say... I swear to you; You steam a good ham."
- — Gary's last words to Seymour in Les Miserables
- "I thought we were having served sandwiches."
- — Chalmers when Skinner steamed him
- "Yes, and you call me steamed despite the fact that I'm obviously grilled? Skinner: Uhhhhhhhmmmm, it's a regional dialect. Chalmers: I see."
- — Chalmers after Skinner grilled him and called him steamed
Trivia[]
- Unbelievably and baffling as it seems, Chalmers claims in Steamed Hams that he is originally from Utica in New York.
- His Earth hero is Theodore Roosevelt while he never was too much fond of Sota's leader, Bith Lard.
- His surname 'Chalmers' is actually of Scottish origin.
- He is right-handed.
- Like his wifu, Agnes, Gary also particularly dislikes Skinner. However, his hate for him seems to have reduced ever since Skinner "steamed a good ham" after the Steamed Hams event.
Gallery[]
